As I pulled out of my Nana's driveway after spending thirty minutes attempting to fit most of everything I could in the back of the truck, I said goodbye (for now) to Southaven, Mississippi (and Memphis area). It was a hot July 28 and before I even got to the interstate I was stuck in traffic as a gaggle of geese crossed the road. The ride wasn't terrible, a few things occurred not planned, therefore, my sadness kicked in. I was new to the big city and I had already felt like I didn't belong. With not a certain place to go, because I had to be there early for work and we couldn't move in to the apartment until the week after..I lived in a hotel..and this is where my Atlanta journey begins!
It's not a terrible journey, don't get me wrong because of the unfortunate mishaps, my family and friends were there for me even though not physically there with me. I began work, I set up my classroom, I prepared myself for lessons to teach, I met amazing teachers, and I went home to a lonely hotel. School started for the students. Third grade. I honestly can't remember the first day, all I remember is the last day I was at that school (and how much I cried during and after school hours). I had never dealt with challenging students before. My days were good only when there was either no fight or just one. That's all I'm going to say about that class I had for four weeks. One Wednesday, an opportunity came to existence-the next week I was relocated to a first grade class at a different school. Let me tell you, I have not cried once..well maybe once or twice because of how thankful I am where I am now!
I'm not sure how or why the opportunity arose but I am so ridiculously grateful that it did.
Thankfully Atlanta got less lonely when Andy and I moved in our apartment, and I started to feel like a decent teacher/human being with my new job! But, some days I actually do miss the road that family of geese made me wait on, I miss spending time with my sweet Nana. I'm glad I got to see her that morning. A Friday in August she had her aneurisms blocked. All day at work I couldn't help myself but worry, especially with no cell phone signal! Terrible! But everything worked out and she's doing well!
I really do hate the distance between here and home. Between myself and people I know and love. I've only met a few people here..but I don't know anyone and I'm not known. I've lived around people and have gone to church with people for years and was never known. So with the stubbornness of mine and difficult to approach type personality I seem to portray, this has been a challenging thing for me. I get homesick, I get lonely, but I have no excuse because I don't try to change that. I wallow in my sadness instead. Which I am aware that's not how it should be. I'm just sharing some truth. Even to myself. My husband has been brutally honest when I let my emotions and selfishness get in the way of seeing things the way they really are. He has shown me more love and grace that points me to where I should be and how I should be thinking. He is amazing.
Andy and I have been going to Trinity Anglican Mission Church. It has been very good! At first I was very hesitant about finding positive things about it because it's different from what I'm used to. But what I've learned is that nothing is the same and it never will be. I'm never going to find another place like Missio Dei-not that there won't be a church as good as it but there's most likely not an exact church just like it. It's the people..they don't have clones unfortunately! Ha!
So..with my picky ways of seeing things, my spoiledness in grace, and my stubbornness to look at
this change as an adventurous opportunity, I am asking for accountability. That I would see this as a blessing, a selfless change in my life, an opportunity to grow and not stop. This is not me being taken away from home..but a journey with my husband, Andy, as he fulfills his dream in school! Oh to be selfless, oh to be more loving, oh to make many memories in the city of Atlanta!
And this..is only the beginning..
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